Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
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