erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize
