ADVERTISEMENT

• (845): View more from New York

  what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?

  Fav 23 3525 829

  share tweet
  

• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit

  Fav 9 1004 2481

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I think I sharted a yagerbomb.

  Fav 15 944 3839

  share tweet
  

• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket

  Fav 42 892 4993

  share tweet
  
• 

  29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (206): View more from Washington

  imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.

  (206): View more from Washington

  Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.

  Fav 21 7308 1142

  share tweet
  

• (214): View more from Texas

  you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.

  Fav 6 4012 1607

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.

  Fav 6 4528 1762

  share tweet
  

• (707): View more from California

  Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis

  Fav 5 1131 3007

  share tweet
  

• (609): View more from New Jersey

  it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.

  Fav 4 1760 1281

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (404): View more from Georgia

  The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed

  Fav 10 3247 1058

  share tweet
  

• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  did she buy you pizza?

  Fav 9 2584 974

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (440): View more from Ohio

  Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.

  Fav 3 1992 829

  share tweet
  

• (713): View more from Texas

  Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"

  Fav 2 1131 744

  share tweet
  

• (937): View more from Ohio

  Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty

  Fav 1 314 409

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (416): View more from Toronto

  The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.

  Fav 2 233 567

  share tweet
  

Randomize