VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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