dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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