It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
