i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
