Texts From Last Night

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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I GOT MY PERIOD!

  (706): View more from Georgia

  damn. i had names picked out.

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  (706): I GOT MY PERIOD! (706): damn. i had names picked out. http://tfl.nu/tcr6
  Replies (18) Good night (7186) Bad night (994)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.

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  (214): I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day. http://tfl.nu/pcf7
  Replies (26) Good night (5282) Bad night (546)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  "Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move

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  (601): "Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move http://tfl.nu/qn14
  Replies (10) Good night (1078) Bad night (3263)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.

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  (716): Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes. http://tfl.nu/xo7e
  Replies (32) Good night (4053) Bad night (1429)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...

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  (650): You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom... http://tfl.nu/m3m8
  Replies (3) Good night (3015) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.

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  (724): noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success. http://tfl.nu/klpq
  Replies (8) Good night (3448) Bad night (879)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  She just said, "are my livers going to die?"

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  (517): She just said, "are my livers going to die?" http://tfl.nu/litp
  Replies (12) Good night (3273) Bad night (1113)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER

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  (203): THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER http://tfl.nu/gk2q
  Replies (7) Good night (1160) Bad night (3033)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  he made a bald eagle out of coke lines

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  (818): he made a bald eagle out of coke lines http://tfl.nu/gy34
  Replies (5) Good night (2280) Bad night (1002)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.

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  (425): Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina. http://tfl.nu/kcmo
  Replies (17) Good night (1261) Bad night (3291)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.

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  (985): He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period. http://tfl.nu/gmxu
  Replies (9) Good night (3009) Bad night (1227)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.

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  (850): Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer. http://tfl.nu/iky6
  Replies (23) Good night (2777) Bad night (734)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.

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  (618): I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away. http://tfl.nu/0di0
  Replies (9) Good night (845) Bad night (645)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now

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  (760): Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now http://tfl.nu/y22e
  Replies (4) Good night (315) Bad night (413)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.

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  (360): The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head. http://tfl.nu/prnc
  Replies (2) Good night (407) Bad night (220)

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