have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize
