Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
bring money and cleavage
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize