Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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