I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
