Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
