All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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