i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
