dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Damn victory sex feels great
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
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