what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
