i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
