I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
