That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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