are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
