i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
