I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
