My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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