yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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