she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize
