I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
