it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
