All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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