I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Randomize
