God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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