3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Randomize