He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
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