You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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