I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
