i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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