Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
