He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
