Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize