The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
