Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
