oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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