I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
