id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
