how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
