Kiss
Puke
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
