His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
