i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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