just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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