The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Randomize
